6 signs someone actually knows Ninjitsu
You’re at a bar, a house party or wherever, and this guy you’re talking to is telling you about how great Ninjitsu is. Ninjitsu guy is going on and on about how much more effective Ninjitsu is for self defense, even declaring the ineffectiveness of your beloved Ground Karate against such powerful techniques. Before you jump up to defend the South American Ground Karate (BJJ) or any other useless martial art let’s review so you’ll know if he is the real deal.
Here 6 signs to know so you don’t get schooled hombre.
- Ninjitsu guy is easily 100+ lbs overweight, but like most American men, he is a mountain of bearded man muscle underneath that layer protective gristle
- Ninjitsu guy is completely out of shape (I mean breathing heavy and sweaty after using the bathroom out of shape)
- Ninjitsu guy only spars under specific circumstances only! They will tell you about the circumstances, don’t worry. Sparring or grappling with an actual Ninjitsu practitioner must be done under the most specific circumstances, usually involving them starting in a completely locked in “control position” by their own words, which usually fails due to them having zero experience in actual person to person conflict. You may die if they go all out and unleash the tiger
- Ninjitsu guy always gives a disclaimer: for real life only. He will talk about how they would easily be able to defeat you in a real life situation, how BJJ is only suited for competition, and because of that they couldn’t use the non-lethal moves. All of this effectively would tie their hands in any sparring because they don’t want to go back to jail
- Ninjitsu guy is a black belt, possibly an 11th and at least a 4th Dan, from some garbage ninjitsu school ran by a guy who adheres to the above mentioned four tenants
- Ninjitsu guy will own an impressive collection of items featured on mallninjashit, he will have at least one very lethal and mega useful weapon on hand
As with Aikido, Ninjitsu is the definitive hiding place for cowards who boldly claim they can beat your ass, but in every actual application of physical work they have a pre-made excuse as to why they can’t do anything but get straight owned in grappling or striking. In Ninjitsu they actually practice this, it is the art of deception. Tricking your opponent into thinking you actually might be a threat, hopefully accompanied by sex from someone nearby who overheard their bad ass claim.